I firmly believe that anyone who can come out, should. The more of us there are leading our happy, responsible, mutually supportive lives, the more people will see that it is possible to be non-monogamous and also be ethical and a good member of our community.
I thought about how hoarders and their loved ones are emotionally (and sometimes physically) crushed by the weight of all the THINGS being held onto. How much time, energy, and effort do we put into caring for possessions that no longer speak to us or give us joy? And why do we do this to ourselves?
We are too loud, we are too strident. We should protest, but gently, softly. (Not unironically, very much like the sweet, girlish voice of Dr. Blasey Ford, whom they politely pretended to listen to, before ignoring.)
Sex happens in a context. And all the complications of everyday life influence the context surrounding a woman’s arousal, desire, and orgasm.
There is so much pleasure in connecting sexually with a partner that can get overlooked if we’re obsessing about our orgasms. I want to offer an alternative to the constant barrage of advice on orgasms—how many, which kind, did you squirt, etc…. Pleasure is much more than just having an orgasm. The goal of this chapter is to encourage women to explore pleasure for its own sake.